Tuesday, May 3, 2011

i don't expect you to understand.

Full name: Annika Leigh Madsen.
Snapshot: I do not expect you to understand who I am or why I am the way I am.. cause frankily i think that is near impossible. But i do expect you to not judge me based on what you think. To many times do I hear things about me I never knew.. coming from people I didn't know necessarily knew me. So maybe I build up walls to everyone I ever meet. So maybe I watch the grinch every night before i go to bed. So maybe i get defeated and can't keep that smile going on my face. maybe i have over ten notebooks full of thoughts, doodles, anything you can imagine. So maybe all i have asked for, for the last three birthdays is a metal detector.. maybe i dream of dancing in front of millions when in reality i can't even have the confidence to perform in front of twenty. maybe thats me. but until you know exactly why i am the way i am... please don't act like you know me. I build up walls because the second i get close to people... their gone. Watching my second mom walk out of my life in ninth grade taught me how fragile relationships are. Seeing some of my best friends turn around and walk away from the promises. from everything. Getting close to a guy, and thinking they are "the one".. then learning who they really are at school the next day... Attending funerals on end.. just walking past wishing i could have two more minutes with them.You never really know nor can trust a person... You never know how long you have until they are gone. I am sick of people wondering why it is so hard for me to open up.. and not to be poor me... but there are to many reasons for me not to. I don't feel like i need to justify myself to who ever may be reading this.. but trying to explain the slightest bit why i am the way i am may help. People think i am stuck up, rude, full of myself... i keep to myself because it is not worth my time to try and explain..

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